Salutations, DANGLERS – it's a mighty, meaty Monday, with plenty of DANG nutrients on-the-bone. So tuck in your bib, slurp out that marrow, and drop and give me 20, because it's time for new music and new cartoons.
ALERT! A NEW DANG SINGLE has breached the containment zone. As of today, NO THANK YOU is out to purchase or stream. 3 succulent songs of varying flavor profiles smooshed together in a thick, dusty tortilla and served on a black rectangle that fits in your hand and demands all of your attention. Behold, this guy on the cover:
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Check out the full version of NO THANK YOU, as well as 2 new DANG songs – a line through a circle and disclaimer– at the throbbing buttons below:
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We can't celebrate a new single release without a brand spanking new cartoon, so here's that. No ape cheerleaders were harmed or paid in the making of this video.
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Amazing work ur doing here. It seems like you know the day of destruction is soon. Anything youd like to share to prepare for the coming days? Thank you so much
- Iderjavkhlan
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Hi Iderjavkhlan –
It's true, it's coming and I know all about it. First things first – buy the biggest bulk pallet of granola bars you can find. Bury them in a yard. Mark the mound with a twig that you'll never forget. G-bars will be the currency of the wasteland. And if inflation keeps up what it's doing, you're going to want those puppies to have as many chocolate chips in them as possible if you want to stay ahead in the new world.
Secondly, invest in sleeveless shirts. They will be all the rage in our desolate future. Accessorize with elbow pads and knee pads, but be sure to keep your look fiercely asymmetrical. Matching sets of pads = poser junk. Consider a sassy mohawk. If a ravenous band of acid bandits respects the inner Bad Boy reflected in your fashion choices, they may spare you AND your granola bars – and might even throw in a little cool-guy handshake to top it all off.
That's all I can think of off the top of my head. I don't think you will really need to stock or store anything else in advance. They'll probably have water, shelter and supplies on Amazon for at least the first 50 years after the apocalypse, so just keep your Prime account active and clear the road spikes for the delivery drivers.
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